Management sux

I made a very difficult decision last night. It tore me up inside.

The attendance I consolidated was not sufficient for me to justify the $25 cost of opening the music room. So I sought a consensus with my committee members.

We agreed to cancel band practice.

This is how badly we need people to start coming for practice. It’s just 2 bloody hours a week. Is it really that freaking difficult?

Next week had damn well better be one full house. My committee members are working their asses off already. They don’t need to put up with this kind of petty problem crap.

---

This morning I woke up in an air-conditioned room. Funny. I don’t turn it on when I’m working the next day.

I later found out that a small explosion happened in our kitchen. My mum was preparing food and had put the lid on a pot. I don’t understand how one that is built for such a purpose actually failed the QC and exploded into little pieces all over the kitchen floor.

Thankfully my mummy was standing a distance away when it happened so she wasn’t injured directly from the impact of flying glass.

It was the cleaning up for the next 2 hours that took a toll on mummy. With the entire kitchen floor covered in glass, my mum had to sweep, vacuum and wash up the whole area. My wonderful mum decided to let me sleep properly during this time so she closed my door and turned on the aircon, so I was oblivious to everything till I woke up.

---

From this weekend onwards, from 10am - 5pm, I'll be stuck in school having class. Doesn't that suck?

I already don't feel the Friday mood any more. I mean, what's there to be celebratory about when every morning you get up, you are either going for work or for class?

I suspect I'll actually be looking forward to my weekdays than the weekends.

Ice Age 2 was my escapism from reality

Ice Age 2 is pretty much like what the reviews in Life! and The New Paper wrote. I’m pretty much combining the reviews of both papers here because they really did catch the whole gist of the movie.

Nothing really refreshing, but it was still funny, cute and enjoyable. The happily-ever-after ending was predictable. It’s a cartoon after all. But I like cartoons. These animators are amazing. Whoever once said cartoons are only for kids to watch, definitely grew up too fast.

I like how they inserted the song “Food Glorious Food” from Oliver into the movie. Definitely well-suited for the scene. HAHAHA! Very funny one-liners here and there. To appreciate what the beetle said when he was rolling this big ball (with his family of beetles behind him), you must know that he is a dung-beetle (dung meaning shit, or crap). I guess that’s the only one you had to know the nature of the animal before getting the joke. Everything else… well, like other comedies there’re inferences here and there that are up to you to catch.

Lousily done review from me. So watch the movie! Hahaha!

Oh, and I watched it at Cathay. That newly opened place beside Plaza Singapura. No shops opened yet within that building. The cinema levels were rather crowded. Saw Quan Yifeng, her husband and their daughter. No one bothered. Isn’t it great to be a media personality in Singapore?

It was good to know that the seats were genuinely new. You could kind of still smell it. Each seat is very spacious – just like Cineleisure. The entire movie was digital. Good good! I am guessing this location will be more for the twenty-somethings than the pre-twenties at Cineleisure, who seem to have a good time making the ground floor a little too smoke-infested.

---

Last night I was having a minor breakdown. A little like depression. The stress got into me bad.

A friend who works in the same building as myself hadn’t seen me for a while but commented I looked run-down. But even my band friend said something along those lines. The stress and lack of rest is really showing huh?

As if that’s not enough, I understand that one of my committee members isn’t exactly the happiest with the way I’m handling things with regards to band. Honestly, I thought I was doing fine. I mean, apart from getting people to come down for practice, I really thought that although everything is going slowly, but at least there’s some progress bit by bit.

My studies definitely need more attention. I need to sit down and do a full paper of accounts. I haven’t done that before. In fact, I’ve never completed any question without having to refer to the suggested answers.

At work, there’s more and more that needs my working on. I don’t mind it, but I’m just not at a very good state of mind to handle them now. Need a day off to recuperate. Need a day off to de-stress.

Now I know what stress is. Too many decisions to make, people to look after, work to do. All these clashing together at the same moment. Each one important in its own way. Every decision made, word said, job done would implicate something in the future or the big picture.

I feel as if no one understands what I’m going through. But I sure as hell don’t wish it upon anyone to know because only one who has gone through it can. No one should have to go through this shit. Yet everyone has their set of problems which I myself can’t understand or empathise with, so who am I to ask for someone to understand my situation?

I just don’t believe it. If others can handle bigger stresses like children and major strategic decisions, all at the same time, why can’t I handle what I am going through right now?

What’s the worse that could happen?
I fail my exams and repeat another year.
I fail at managing the band and cause its downfall. (In case you’re wondering, this is always a possibility each year.)
I end up having people hate me for failing at managing the band.
I screw up at work and land up getting fired.

Is failure so scary?
It sure does look like it. Exams and work my heart can probably still take it. But if the band falls because of me, damn, I’ll probably hate myself forever.
I don’t do it for money you know? If anything I try to pay some expenses from my own pocket. What do you do in your life that demands this from you? Do share. It’d be nice to know what else is out there that is putting up a fight. (I would imagine most art groups?)

Not only do I now understand what is stress.

I understand what is survival. Having to go against the odds and press-on. Puck up the courage and do what needs to be done so we continue to exist.

I understand what is passion too. Fighting for what you believe in without need for reward. Willing to sacrifice to make it work. And that satisfaction you get, no money can buy.

Must. Persevere.

Never an easy weekend

Friday night:
Band this week was pretty disastrous - attendance wise - but at least we've got a conductor... I managed to sit my entire committee down for the first time and discss the plans going forward.

I feel a little more at ease about the plans now, only that alot of work will be needed to make them happen. If I plan for something, I want it to happen. There are contingencies of course, but I damn well will aim for the original plan.

I'm a bitch to work under. And I'm not even getting paid for this. It's all passion I tell you. My drive is higher. Probably explains why I'm even more pushy. But I've promised myself to make sure to reward each person I've pushed... My form of redemption.

PS: For anyone who cares, Clementi Town Secondary School (CTSS) will be shifting to New Town Secondary School's old premises for 2 years starting Jan'07. In case anyone's interested.
This type of news will definitely hit the alumni band hard. Just when I thought I had things settled, stupid things like this must come up again.

When I left for home, I realised I hadn't had dinner. It was 11pm. Went to the counter to get a meal home. I know that once I got home, I'd be in front of the computer working on band administrative stuff. [A habit I caught from work. Thankfully, it's a good habit.]

Guess what?
"A filet meal, drink change to ice-tea, no upsize. Thanks"
From the left side of my ear were the words: "Hey! Clarice!"

FYI, Clarice is a name I used in Poly and ONLY poly.

This guy was someone I had met while writing for my school paper. I'd lost contact with him a long time back. I like keeping in touch with people, but, I'm sorry, this guy was just not in that list of people.

So happens this guy has been calling me the past couple of weeks but I was always at work, school or something. Plus, I wasn't very interested in picking it up.

And I had to bump into him.

Singapore's sometimes a liiiiiittle too small huh?

I grabbed my food and made my exit quickly. Sure enough, I was in front of the computer for the next hour, munching and typing. I'm a sucker for doing summaries of my own meetings. I feel more in control. People don't understand that minute-takers have a certain power. Like personal assistants/secretaries.

I am having funny ideas about organising this grand event, in view of the school's temporary shifting, for a gathering of alumni from CTSS. Possible? I think it is. I am sure it will be very difficult, but do-able. I wonder... will I be able to pull off such a mega project? Will I have such a chance to try?

---
Super long Saturday:
Needless to say, I was still feeling extremely tired from the night before. After breakfast, Ki came over and almost immediately started his gaming.

So engrossed..

He especially liked it when we made Homer Simpson change into only his underwear, which Kiki calls pampers.

A small mess he made outside my room. We finally managed to pull him away from the xbox.

Dearie finally made his way over, and got Bladey along too. The 3 boys sat at the balcony talking while Ki played with the dough my mum prepared.

But it wasn't long before Ki headed into the room and the 3 of them landed up playing with the Xbox again.

They left for LAN gaming at nearby Ginza Plaza. Evon was there waiting for them. I was very reluctant to let Dearie go, but I was still tired, Ki was around, and I had a karaoke competition (preliminary round) that night.

Ki was finally rocked to sleep. I decided to pop in the VCD I was to use later, just to check. Sure enough, as luck would have it, only that 1 track I was supposed to use couldn't play on either VCD player at home.

Panic. I was pretty much prepared for a nap actually. I grabbed my keys, didn't even brush my hair, put sunblock or ANYTHING.. got my purse and left. I was pissed off. In a paid of old shorts and a ready-to-be-a-rag t-shirt, I walked to Clementi central. I didn't get the VCD that I needed. All I needed was that 1 Kit Chan song.

My mum called and said I should go to Popular Bookstore at Jurong East. ARGH. I was EVEN more pissed off. I was ready to doze off anytime and here I am walking around in the heat getting a dumb VCD I know I'll probably not be able to find.

I did make the trip to the CD shop at Jurong East. I asked the shop assistants and they didn't have it. I searched for alternatives and grabbed a VCD with a song I roughly knew on it.

I trudged home. Ready to beat up and cuss at anyone who stood in my way. I opened the VCD, popped it into the VCD player, and was ready to smack it when I realised it wasn't a Karaoke VCD but just the MTV. Trust me, I seldom get pissed off like this, but when I do, it can be quite ridiculous.

But why didn't I rip the VCD into pieces? Because Ki was there. The cute little thing had woken up and gave me a hug and started to climb all over me. I tell you all anger melted when he did that. The unbelievable power of the Ki. Heehee!

Anyway, my mum was getting very kan cheong too. I took out my only other karaoke VCD. A-mei's. It was the only backup. My parents, in a last ditch attempt took a car-ride to some other cd shop, but to no avail. Guess what my mum did that I'd never have done?

My mummy brought the VCD to the community centre and asked the fellas there to play the track there. Amazingly, it worked. I was at home then. I didn't see what happened, but damn, how it is possible I still wonder.

By 7pm, I was registered and had to wait for my turn (2nd last person) to go on stage to sing. 8 out of 17 people would enter the semi-finals. My mum likes me to join these things. So I go. No harm. Hardly any such opportunities once you're outta school anyway. My mum paid $10 for registration, so MUST go. Haha!

The only way I can get returns on "investment" is if I be the top 8 of the total 34 who had signed up. Blech.

While my parents took care of Ki who was running all over the community centre, I was sitting there alone waiting for my turn. Argh. Dearie and Bladey hadn't come yet. Anger was riling up again.

On the flip side, I met a fellow band member there. Pretty girl hor?

Compared to me - my mum snapped this just before I went on. She just snapped. Hahaha! Looking fat and tired here huh?

When it was close to my turn, my parents dragged Ki to the hall and waited for me to go up on stage. He likes to clap.

My dad took a video of me singing on stage, so no photos. I was pretty satisfied with how I sounded. Confident enough to say I'd get through to the next round. First time my dad hear me sing. Heehee!

Right after the last fella sang, I was running around the community centre with Ki. I tell you that running I did there let me sweat enough to lose whatever weight gained from dinner earlier. He loved to run around so much that he didn't want me to stop. Eeks.

My number got called, so I went up on stage as one of the semi-finalists. My band friend got in too!!! Yay! Time to hunt for another karaoke VCD. ARgh. I hate this part. Can never find anything I want. I'm glad I made it through anyway. I'm sure my parents too.

And if you think Saturday night was over for Ki, it wasn't. Guess what he did when he got back?

Look at how he's sitting? Aiyo.

Bladey had the honour of Ki talking and playing with him. He doesn't do that with everyone. Haha!

Ki even let him eat his sweets. I think he particularly liked it when he plonked onto Bladey's tummy. As if it were a cushion. Ki's 13kg. Imagine that weight bouncing on your stomach. HAHAHA!
[Dearie had it worse last week. Ki JUMPED onto his stomach. A few times.]

Ki definitely liked to play with Bladey. Probably because he prefers to play with guys. Like they understand what he wants better, and how to play the game better too.

Dearie wasn't neglected either.

But it wasn't too long before they had to go off again. This time for supper. Blech. I was supposed to bathe and sleep. I think I played with Ki some more, until he was ready for bed.

I had a nice long bath, turned on the aircon, and got ready for bed.

*RING RING*
My mobile went off.

Dearie presented me with a dilemma: An invitation to go karaoke-ing with his gaming friends. My brain started weighing the pros and cons.

The pros won.

I told my mum, changed my clothes and waited for Dearie to pick me up. Yeah. I was exhausted. But the bath helped. I did intend to go karaoke-ing that night. Dearie knew. It was why he asked. Awwwww...

Too bad, it wasn't long before I got pissed off again. Dearie handed me a helmet with no visor and was waaay too loose for me. I had to hold it in place myself. So much for safety huh? Grrrr... the one I usually wear is too small for Bladey so he didn't bring it out but damn, I don't know how Bladey managed to tahan that helmet.

Got there at 1am. Semi-pissed off. 'Cos Dearie usually doesn't like KTV-ing, but I guess he wanted to be there this time because the rest of his World of Warcraft friends were there. Including Evon. That was another draw for me to be there. At least another person I know, and definitely wouldn't mind me gatecrashing.

They had this really huge room. So cool. Plenty of beer around. Dearie and I didn't drink - he, because he rode; me, because I don't like to. Plenty of them were quite high. It was a long time since I'd been around such a bunch. Very fun people of ages 20 to 30+. About 12-15 of them? I can't remember.

I didn't mingle. I was too tired to do that. I just wanted to listen to people sing, and have a go at it myself. Just a couple of songs would do. There was this guy who could sing and rap Jay CHou's songs. Now THAT was amazing. I sapped up every moment he had the mic with Jay's songs.

I was all ready to go home at 4am. But they were going for supper. One of the guys puked in the room. THe youngest one. Haha! So funny and disgusting. A very fun loving bunch of fellas. Great to hang out with for laughs. Dearie and bladey didn't seem to mingle around very much but I think they just enjoy being there. I understand that. I was like that too. Haha! Fun lahz.

Went to some ulu ulu corner and had supper. I just had a drink. By the time we left it was probably nearly 6am. I was notably exhausted. Evon had left at 5 I think. She was on morning shift at 7:30am. Poor thing.

Dearie sent me home. My parents were already up. I changed into my pyjamas. Fell onto the bed. I was oblivious to the world once my head hit the pillow.

---
Sunday:
Incredible. Undisturbed sleep till nearly 3pm. First time I woke up so late I think. Wow.

I was zombified, but functioning normally. It didn't seem like long before my parents wanted to head out for an early dinner. I got dragged along to Chinatown to look for VCDs at the same time.

Chinatown was more like a mini-m'sia town to me. Well, ok, maybe mainly 1 shop. I was nice clothes I could wear. The type I'd probably find in KL for cheaper, but my mum and I didn't want to hold up my dad from dinner so we left after browsing.

Walked around to search for the VCD after dinner but no luck. As expected. I thought we were heading home, but my dad drove to IMM to try some more. They really want me to sing well. Haha!

Anyway, still no luck at IMM so we decided to just head home and perhaps try Carrefour one of these days.

I'm looking for Na Ying's "AI SHANG NI DENG YU AI SHANG JI MO". Anyone have the karaoke VCD/DVD?

It was CSI night as usual. Dearie missed half the 9pm episode. But at least we caught the other 2 episodes together, and bits of Coupling which is another British comedy, and Wildboyz on MTV.

---

Tomorrow's Ice Age 2 movie night.

Dearie just reminded me how he once asked me to join him and his friends for the 1st movie. Back then I was always busy part-timing and didn't go with them. I can't remember which year it was already. Back then, we were probably only starting to get to know each other better.

Memories.

Now Dearie is still so sweet. In his own kind of funny way.

---

It was a very very very long weekend. It wasn't easy. But I made it through alive.
Live life to the max.
People like to say that.. but do they really?

I think I am. :O)

Synopsis of next post

My next post is gonna be a long one. Mainly because it was THAT long a weekend. When you read it, you'll know why.

It covers band, family, Dearie, KTV, karaoke competition, yada yada. I don't even know how I managed to make it through.

In case the post doesn't get up tonight, because I have class, I'll be out tomorrow too.

I won tickets via mtv's webbie to catch ICE AGE 2!!! Long awaited movie is finally out!!! HOORAY!!!

Dangling Shoe

This sight scared my sister as she left the house:

This shoe was dangling from what looks like a sarong at the staircase. Can you imagine that this is the first thing you see when you open the door? What would you think?

This photo was taken from where I would stand if I opened the door. Those who step out of the lift would get a slightly different angle but it doesn't change the fact that it still looks freaky. Moreover it only appeared later tonight.

I don't know why anyone would do something like that.

Creative people out there can come up with a caption for this photo? Or perhaps conjure a reason why anyone would do something like that?

Don't tell me you're busy like I'm not

Work's busy.
Band's busy.
Personal life also busy.
My studies are crying for me to get busy with them.

I know I know. I bring it upon myself. But I can't help it. It makes me feel good. And I didn't exactly ask to take over the band this year. Neither did I expect my bosses to give me more work this year too.

So when my band members tell me they're too busy to make 3 hours to come for band practice, you can't blame me for feeling a little frustrated.

But on the other hand I understand how it works. A little persuasion, nudging... and some of them just need a break. Sigh. I finally get a conductor and now so difficult to get players.

Perhaps I'm just worrying over nothing. Like most of the time. Maybe it's my nature? Haha! I always like to imagine the worst case scenario, and plan how to deal with it. I have extremely slow reactions so planning is my only way of countering that.

---

On the karaoke front, I didn't go practice like I told myself to. Heck. It's probably the least important thing in my life now. Fancy ME saying THAT about singing.

On the American Idol front, "Chicken Little" is FINALLY out. I like Elliot's voice. But I think Taylor will win - and deserves to. And Barry Manilow is amazing. He can just play the piano like that, and arrange the music ..... amazing. That's my kind of thing. I'd like to learn that. Not some dumb business degree.

On the online shopping front, well, I just can't stop. It's almost more exciting to wait for the mail than shop. Almost.

Sooooo many things I could update. A little too mundane to do so, but everything's real exciting in my life now. May not be going as smoothly as I like, but I've always sought for an adventure. I think I'm having one right now.

There's sooooo much to do.... so much that can be done... just a matter of how much you want to!
I'd rather say that I tried, than wait a few years later and think back, "Damn, why didn't I...?"

Don't you?

Best news all week!

My previous conductor, Mr Chia, is willing to come back and conduct us for this mid-year concert!

But he hasn't heard our standard yet. I hope he doesn't change his mind.....

I'm super excited about this Friday's practice. I need to gather as many players as possible now. Woohoo!

You have no idea how great my smile was the entire afternoon when I finally managed to reach him.

I "conducted".. Ki didn't starve... and karaoke's coming

My dear conductor (fellow band mate) didn't turn up till 8pm, so in the meantime, I had to conduct. I have no idea how to, so I was pretty much a stationary metronome.

But now that I have tried, I think I should try again. Hmm... But only till I can find a conductor to take over. My goodness, our band cannot continue without a proper one who knows exactly what's going on in the music. Anyone knows anyone who is interested in conducting an alumni band? Unfortunately we do not have enough money to pay a salary... Sigh...

---

The poor little boy was still sick, but he was still playing his heart out. Check out what he did to the styrofoam to create "snow".

He fanned it all over the house. Thank goodness for the vacuum cleaner.

He was down with a fever but ran around the house like usual. Doesn't he look like he lost weight?

He watched some VCD my mum bought, and taught him stuff by making him repeat the words. Good VCD I say.

He looks like a little king in that chair. Haha!

Later that evening, Ki vomitted and my mum made him go back to sleep.

Dinner had to be cancelled so Dearie and I called Mac in. We're such lazy bums and suckers for fast food. Can you believe it? I didn't step out of the house the entire weekend. But spent $80 on clothes. HAHA! I was exhausted from the entire week. Staying at home was puuurrrrfect for me.

Ki woke up. He seemed a little better. My mum wanted to get him to watch Finding Nemo in my room. I turned on the X-box (which doubles up as a DVD player), but I somehow couldn't get it to work. I didn't want to bother Dearie to come set it up, so I popped in the game "The Simpsons".

It's some crazy game where you drive around and have to complete tasks. I like it. I was sure Ki was going to like it too. And he did.

Dearie came to teach him how to control the vehicle. Can you imagine his glee when he could choose to drive a car, lorry or YELLOW BUS? He was soooo excited!

The good thing about this game? You get coins for knocking into stuff, so knock away!~ He liked it when the cars started to smoke after knocking around too much, and went BOOM. He also liked it when he knocked down too many people, and the police came to catch him!

As if that wasn't enough, Dearie and I taught him how to get off the vehicle, walk around, and find people to kick. HAHA!

Took nice videos of Dearie and Ki having fun, with my dad joining in later on to watch. My mum was pretty appalled at the game. Ki only got more amused. Heehee!

Dearie stayed over that night. Not before catching The Forgotten, Gangs of New York, and a couple of other random shows I think. We were probably too sleepy to care.

---

Instead of having a CSI TV night, we converted it into an afternoon from noon to 3pm. Dearie went back, and I lazed around the house the rest of the day. I don't even remember what I did at all.

---

Today, the notice for the company karaoke competition was put up. Our division did not win the bowling competition held on Sunday so my GM is extra determined to nail the karaoke thingy.

Worst part: He's arrowed me publicly for this competition. He didn't specifically say I have to take part, but hey, you've got to understand what he means right? Pretty blatant if he sent the email to everyone.

Oh no... I haven't got a song to sing. I mean, I probably do, but I don't have the karaoke VCD for it. It's Na Ying's Ai Shang Ni Deng Yu Ai Shang Ji Mo (Love you equals fall in love with loneliness). I need to find substitutes.

To the extent to planning on going to Party World at Clementi after work on Wednesday, get a drink, and pick songs for an hour. I figured it's cheaper.

Why don't I do it tomorrow (Tues)?

I'd like to, but I've got bloody class tomorrow. Yep. Revision classes start tomorrow. I'm screwed. I still catch-no-ball when it comes to accounts.

---

So it's back to band, school and work.
This multitasking thingy is proving to be too much to me.
Let's see how the events unfold.

My life.
Kinda boring when you read my blog entries 'cos it's always about the same stuff.

But it's uniquely mine. And I think it's colourful. And most importantly, I'm happy. Frustrated and stressed at the moment, but essentially, still happy. :O)

Pictures not really loading

I can't seem to get the photos of Ki, from this weekend, up onto the blog. Hmm..

Anyway, yes, he didn't starve. I was very surprised at the number of comments left on that post. I think it was stress getting to me. Thank you all. :O)

Dinner didn't happen last night. My sis' bf's birthday dinner was postponed because sick little Ki threw up. He's better now I think.

Meanwhile, my rabbit's leg is still in bad condition. The other rabbit just keeps bullying him. Ahhh....

Band practice on Friday night has left me more stressed than ever. We're badly in need of a conductor. Anyone who's interested? Heehee...

No point stressing. Need to act. To do something. Just like my studies.

Irresponsible

My mummy asked me to do ONE simple thing. Go to the rice cooker, flick the switch to "COOK", then 10min later, flick it back to "WARM" so when Ki comes over, there'll be porridge.

But NOOOOO.

What the hell happened? I flicked it to "COOK", but let it stay there till it became rice. Ki's got no porridge when he comes over later.

How irresponsible can I get? It's just one simple thing!

Why did I forget?

I was too engrossed with my breakfast and online shopping. This is just bad. I feel so damn guilty now. People screw up, but not at simple things like this. To think that I'm tasked to manage the band, committee and at work, possibly a colleague.

Sigh. Cannot stand this kind of mistake.

Stressed up

I can't believe I'm still spending more time doing band stuff and work than studying.

ARGH!

I'm going nuts. Can't wait for a ktv session.

But it's not just to relax. I also need to find a song I can potentially sing for the company karaoke contest. As if that's not hard enough, I also need to find the vcd for it if I come across something. That's that hard part.
[Anyone know if Na Ying's Ai Shang Ni Deng Yu Ai Shang Ji Mo got ktv vcd/dvd? I saw the song in my sister's playlist, I realised that I could possibly try it.]

I'm not going bowling this Sunday. They found someone better. Good for me I guess. I ought to be studying.

Tomorrow is my sister's bf's bday. Whole family will be going for dinner. Dearie and I will probably be lazing around the whole weekend - of course, unless we actually get any studying done.

I'm still freaking stressed up. Need to sleep first. So so so tired... but why is it still so hard to sleep?

Going bonkers

It's been a while since I've said I'm going nuts, but I think I am.

Different fronts crashing in together..

Work:
Worked till 8:30pm last night. Tomorrow need to rush out the minutes of another meeting. I love my job.. I want to take on more stuff.. but with my studies at the back of my head, it's getting increasingly tough.

Studies:
Absolutely zilch studying this week. That's bad. Revision classes start next week. I'll have exactly 1 month to get my act together and be ready to take the exams.

Band:
Facing problems with the most problematic of all - getting players to turn up for practice. It's the age-old problem. Then there's the financial constraints. Not to mention other difficulties involved in getting a concert up.

I'm screwed from all sides aren't I?

Civil Service Club @ Bukit Batok

The Civil Service Club @ Bukit Batok (or CSC for short) is just opposite my sister's place. Perfect for Kiki.

My parents have already signed up with the club at $300 a year.

It's open for the public these few weekends, so my parents brought me, ki, and his parents there. It was bustling with people. Adding on to that, there were stalls along the corridor selling all sorts of things. Amongst them was Coverlooks, offering free photograph-taking for children.

Ki had his go at it, but was nervous in front of a foreign camera despite us adults being monkeys.

The pool is almost a miniature version of the public one at Jurong. It had 1 big slide, a playground-like area, the lazy river, wave pool, and the one for normal swimmers. Same floats too.

To get prepped for Sunday (IF I do go.... because they may have found a better player...), my mum thought I should have a go at the bowling alley. I even brought my socks along. But alas, there was a long waiting list. Bah. Open house.

Ki liked the colourful balls. He knows the balls are too heavy to carry. He must really want to grow up quick.

The gym was just a floor up. I'm not a gym person so I don't know how to appreciate the place. I did like the view though. Ki was more interested in other things. Like the exercise balls.

His papa gave a go at it too. My goodness. I covered my ears when he did that.
Mummy says it looks like he laid an egg. HAHAHA!

My turn to give a bounce!

Here's Ki's parents - with a sneak peak at the long view of the gym and part of the scenary.

The spa just outside the gym is still not ready. Blech. There was a little path we could use to overlook the place. Here's what we see.

Told ya it was crowded.

Here's the slide I was talking about.

Club in the heartlands...


We could stand at these nice pavillion-like things. Great place to hold a gathering. Only downside is that it ain't free. ARGH. No chairs either, but who needs those if you can just sit on the wooden floor. I don't mind. A tiny BBQ pit comes with each pavillion thingy. (Long distance photo of these are in the first photo. Spot them?)

There is a jackpot room somewhere there but I didn't get to see it. Not very sure what else lies within but I may just drop by the pool some day - provided its not as crowded as Jurong's.

---

Ki was very reluctant to go back after. Brought him to the carwash where we were stuck in a long queue.

My mum managed to entertain Ki.

When we did get back, the naughty little boy got difficult. He wanted to sit in his old pram and go downstairs with us.

He's so incredibly cute. Look at that beautiful smile...

It wasn't there when we drove off and waved goodbye...
I can't wait to see him again.

Little baby Zaki.

Too short a weekend

As mentioned in my previous post, before my exam, I spent the entire morning messing around with Ki.

One of the books required one to join the dots in a sequential order. Ki tried his hand a few.

This was what became of the pictures - anything that resembled like he joined dots were hand-helped by my mummy.

Such a short time, but so much fun.

He spent quite a lot of time with this deck of cards. Picking them up and throwing them all over the floor.

Even on the sofa he was doing that.


Spent the next 2 1/2 hours in the exam hall squeezing words onto an exam script. 3 essays to write - supposed to be very little for an exam. But how come I only filled 5 pages?!?!?! The minimum requirement! Argh. I don't believe it. It wasn't as if the questions were hard either! How can this be?!?! I didn't study for marketing and I managed to write at least 2 pages for each of the 4 essays - and ran out of time for the last one!

I got over it quick enough though. I thought I was dressed nicely. Tube top, cropped-knit sweater, jeans, with a good make-up day. Dearie picked me up from school, and off we went to Suntec for the IT show.

We went to grab food at KFC first. Too hungry. Met up with Bladey and Voidy and his GF (who, to me, resembled Jaime Yeo).

Walked around the IT show after. Pretty lousy show. Only attraction was the Xbox 360 launch. It wasn't even as crowded as other years. It wasn't long before we headed for the rest of them to have dinner at MacDonalds. Great service - they helped us get seats and an extra chair when we needed it.

They were off to the arcade after, but Dearie claimed he was tired. Again. Wanna compare who was more tired?! Argh...

What to do? Went back home lor. Not before I popped in several shops to check the prices of some items and what would be "in". Nothing exciting going on. Seemed like I wasn't missing much. No sale some more. Ridiculous prices. My sister might not agree. She's starting to get sucked into the typical-media-person realm, and it doesn't help that her salary is supporting it. Ah well. Different lifestyle. The market needs people like her to thrive. Many of things I'd like, but I sure as hell ain't going to splurge $150 on a pair of heels, and $100 on a top that's not even a signature piece!

Once the exams are over, I'll be in time for mid-year sales and will buy some trend tops. That means it'll be time to donate my older clothes. Too damn lazy to sell them off.

Back to home. Dearie and I spent the rest of the night in front of the TV. Hardly anything to watch. But we did catch The Pianist. War shows are so sad. At least this one didn't show too much torture. Just alot of shots in the heads. I still cannot wipe off the images that I've seen in movies/shows where they re-enacted torture - like the gas chamber and pumping of water in the stomach. *shiver*

It was 3am when Dearie went back. I slept soundly by the time he got home. Luckily we didn't go catch a late night movie. Might have slept through it.

---

Sunday. Awoke to Ki's sounds of "Ah yee get up. Wake up!"

Little cheeky boy spent the entire afternoon at our place. I played with him lots. But I also caught a few episodes of THe Nanny. Wonderful series. Still funny today.

It wasn't long before 4pm that we prepared to set off for the Civil Service Club @ Bukit Batok.

And that's another post on its own.

Time out for now.
Off to watch the F1 race on tv!

Balancing my life

I have been extremely busy at work. Pretty ridiculous workload - but of course, only because I have studies to worry about. Without it, I strongly believe I can handle it all.

I missed the 1st band practice for the year yesterday night thanks to a lousy accounts exam. Bloody exam wanted us to draw up a balance sheet, profit and loss, cash flow and many other stuff in 3 hours. I was out of there in 2 1/2 hours - without the balance sheet, P/L nor cash flow. HAHAHA! Waste of time.

I had my vice-president take care of things at band. When I went over to Macdonalds at Clementi, we had a meeting to discuss matter arising from practice (which I heard had a good turn out!!!) and things to note for the next.

It's fun to be the manager. You get to delegate the tougher work. But at the same time, I realise that being a manager means a hell lot of resposibilities, requires incredible foresight and planning, and need to monitor the work being done.

I also notice how much confidence I need to have at being the leader of this band. And this type of confidence cannot be from any make-up or beautiful clothes you have, but from being able to have trust in your decisions and directions. Absolutely having faith in your members to do the work. Putting on the front that I know what I'm doing, and everything will turn out fine.

What I learn and observe at work, I'm applying at band. What I do at band, I apply at school work. What I learn at school, I apply at work. How handy all these are coming together.

Wonderful that I have a great boyfriend, a superb family [A pity my sister has to treat our home like a hotel cum laundry though. Comes home once every 2-3 days, throws her clothes down, occasionally sleeps over. My mum must feel like a chambermaid. Sigh...] and very supportive friends.

Unless you've tried working and studying at the same time, I don't think one can understand how much it take out of you - of course, unless you are a mother, you're in a totally different league altogether.

I have an HR exam in less than 2 hours. But ki's here so needless to say, so much for studying.

I'll be going to the IT show later on. I want to pick up 2 thumbdrives - one to backup all the photos of kiki in our computer, another one for myself. I also read there's a booth at level 4 (in the IT fair???) for Casio Privias - which are digital pianos. Who knows? I may just pick one up there!

Next week will be another killer week at work. My job scope is beginning to grow and include more things. I'm fine with that. I learn more. Plus it's easier to justify a pay raise. Slowly I'll pick up more managerial tasks I think. SLLLOOOWWWWLLLYYY.

I still do not think I should ever be a manager in an office. I'll so screw it up. Being a "manager" at band is a totally different thing - people help, and genuinely want everything to work out. No hidden agenda, no politicking.

I'm considered relatively poor compared to others who are getting so much more in terms of salary and bonuses. But I strongly believe that as a person, I am growing richer everyday. The people who love the arts usually have to sacrifice their monetary wealth for their pursuit - I understand that now.

But it'll be worth it.
It is worth it.

A mundane post

Stayed in the office 8pm yesterday. So much for studying again. By the time I got home I was exhausted. The night seemed extremely short.

Don’t get me wrong. I love my job. I love the environment. I somewhat enjoy having all these things thrown at me. Taking up as much as possible to challenge myself. I believe that work is just work. What I’m given, just do to the best of my abilities.

Like what one of the CSI agents in CSI Miami said, work is just a job to get the paycheck; I have a life you know?

And that’s when salary comes in – this life needs to be supported. Haha! I am intending to splurge $1500 on a digital piano (‘cos the actual piano is too large for our flat). I am also not giving up the possibility of sponsoring some expenses for the band.

Give me a salary adjustment!!! Hahahaha!
But like all super structured organisations, this can only happen at a stipulated time of the year, and for us, it’s July. Happy waiting….

---

Dearie overslept for no reason apparently. He went to bed at 2:30am but didn’t wake up till 2+ the following day. His exam started at 2pm. It’s not like him to sleep so much unless he’s ill. Maybe in this case he is falling sick.

My mum bought him a box of chicken essence. Hope it helps. I think that drink is repulsive. I only drink it because I trust it to perk me up – maybe because it’s so yucky. But dearie thinks it’s delicious. EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE….. hahaha!

---

Tomorrow’s paper is for accounts. Which clashes with our 1st band practice for the year.

Saturday freaking AFTERNOON is HRM.

These 2 papers need my intensive studying. It was not possible this week. I need a lot of practice for accounts. I still can’t get a balance sheet nor a cash flow correct. Neither can I grasp any of the concepts in words. Trust me, if I can’t get these right, I can forget about the more complicated ones.

HRM’s no better. I flipped through a past year paper. The signs are no good.

Either way I’m screwed. 1 ½ months left to the actual exams. There’s just not enough time. I utterly hate exams.

---

I don’t believe it. I haven’t caught Brokeback Mountain. Argh.
I just signed myself up for some company bowling competition next Sunday. Trust me to make my life “exciting” huh? Haha! Plenty of other stuff I can sign myself up to do. I can’t bowl to save my life, but hey, I’m up for something different on a Sunday morning. There’s so much to do in life people! Just being around people is fun. Listening in to what they say, what they do… people watching is interesting.

Karaoke competition for my company should be up next. Jialat. I am sure the GM will ask me to participate again. This year, I don’t have a song to sing yet. I need to go KTV and start flipping through possible choices, find the VCD and start memorising lyrics!!!

Anyway, for the bowling thing, if I bring my camera, be rest assured for photos. Till then, there’ll be a little drought around here. Blame it on school.

Exams SUCK.

Frustration at it's peak?

It’s funny how the only pressure to ask for a pay raise comes from the people around me. Actually, except for my pig of a sister, I don’t think anyone else is very aggressively telling me I’m too underpaid. Partially it’s because she’s earning A LOT more than I am.

It’s not as if I’m not doing a good job. At least that’s what I’ve been told. My bosses have been treating me extremely well. My colleagues are warm and sweet too. But because of the nature of my job – admin – it is seen as something that is not important. Not that my direct bosses think so, but the structure of the organisation makes it seem so.

Otherwise why should my salary differ so much from what others can get outside? I am so tempted to ask for a pay raise in July. Ever heard of market adjustment people? Adjust mine lehz!!!

I am not asking for the money because I need it, but probably out of pure pressure that I am feeling from those around me. I just feel that as much as I am happy, I am quite sick and tired of being faced with the usual: “You are getting paid what?!?! Leave the damn place now!” And truth be told, I am sure that this salary would affect any interview I get in the future for any other job. I can almost hear it: “How come your expected salary jump so much from your current?”

I have to work on a set of minutes, sending out 2 agendas, a Kaizen project’s presentation, some data entry, converting something from hard copy to soft copy through pure typing (it’s one thick set ok?), conduct an internal security audit, send out the monthly reports, and amongst other stuff yet to be done.

And this is just work.

There’s more at band. And my studies. HA! What a joke. Last night I tried to study my HRM notes but I was too tired that I fell asleep. Not the usual “fall asleep because I am bored” but the “fall asleep ‘cos too tired” type.

---

So much for studying for my Dearie. He just missed his mock paper today because he over slept.

And usually there’s only one reason for his oversleeping.

Told ya gaming is evil.

But I can’t jump to conclusions. Maybe he did have something better to do than gaming last night that made him so tired and still stay up late.

I wonder.

Friends and game and the Oscars

My clique of friends would make a good Singaporean version of “Friends”. If I didn’t have anything better to do, I’d probably have written an entire season’s worth of scripts. I did do well in my script writing in school… once upon a time… hmm…

---

How would you feel if your one of your really close friends got your boyfriend addicted to a game?

It’s ok right? I mean, after all, he’s been such a gamer. Way before meeting him he was already one. A new game was nothing much. It’d be replaced sooner or later anyway.

Then how about when your boyfriend starts to know her work schedule?

That’s all right too. Besides, not only he knows. The bunch who play the game together probably know it by heart too.

But then she starts to call him when you’re with him?

Now this is starting to irk because you only spend the precious weekends with him and she has to call him on his mobile just to tell him about the stupid game.

How about when he calls her for lunch?

I don’t wish to go berserk with jealousy because besides the above-mentioned grounds, I have nothing else to justify it do I?
This is a friend whom we’ve tried to call out for some time but has always said she’s got gaming shit to do or work. Then when we send email, she doesn’t reply – don’t know if she reads – and when we ask why, she says blatantly “NO TIME”.
When MY boyfriend asks her out for lunch, she’s suddenly out there with him.

Hey, I’m not pissed with my boyfriend. I’m actually pissed at HER.

Fine, granted she works shifts and doesn’t have “normal” timetables like ours… Still.. wah kaoz… I’m sure there’re a lot of other people you can call right? If not, go find lahz! Inside the game I thought got a lot of people?!?!?! Otherwise what for spend so much time inside right?!?!?!

I am so thankful the damn subscription to the game is going to end later this month. That’s for Dearie’s only. I don’t know about her. It probably will never end.

Perhaps it’s stress today. I’m feeling it more than usual. 1 day away from the office and work was piled up in my email. It’s not helping when I have to prepare for a band meeting tonight, and my mock exams for HRM and Accounts are this Fri and Sat.

Why I’m still typing this when I’m so busy? Because it lets off steam. Plus, it’s my tea-break time. After letting this out, I might feel better and hopefully, work better.

To hell with World of Warcraft.

Hope the damned server crashes and never gets back up again.

See? I feel better already.

---

I’ll be catching the Oscars tonight. Luckily wonderful E! Entertainment got full coverage – meaning the entire red carpet, the awards, backstage, etc. Only caught a tiny bit this morning. I can’t wait to watch the opening by Jon Stewart.

I’ve seen all the results already.

Lots of movies not yet seen.

They’ll have to wait till after the exams.

Not because I’ll be busy studying of course but because I have to wait for them DVDs to be released. :O)

Unless you have some to lend me? Teeheehee!

Family gathering

We had a family gathering at The Mushroom Pot at The Indoor Stadium. Mainly because my sister had a pay raise - which serves as a reminder of my own. Siiigh... The price of being happy is being poor on the monetary side. [On the bright side, my salary is so low that the govt doesn't even tax me!!!]

Anyway, Ki had a wonderful time making a whole lot of noise and monkey faces.

Our turn: Dearie and me!

The highlight of the night to Ki was not dinner but the playground outside that place. He loved it.

Made me and my sister go up and down with him. His mama and papa managed to get away scott free and just watched.

He's such a rough little boy. But so incredulously cute.

Ran around so much he didn't want to go back. Even when we said he was coming over to our place.

Eventually managed to get him back. Active little boy continued having loads of fun, while Dearie and I tried to watch TV.

Cheeky little fella. Growing fatter eh? Haha!

I took a few videos so there's a lack of photos here. The cute little boy drifted off to sleep pretty late. Dearie and I hung around and just kept watching TV.
Caught The Road To Perdition, After The Sunset, Species II, and I can't remember if there was anything else in between. Just kept flipping around.

Dearie slept over and when we woke up it was already 1pm. oops.

Ki already made a bigger mess of the house than it was when we went to bed. He was playing with some dough my mum made for him.

Needless to say, the whole place was covered with flour. Dearie and I were not spared. Ki still had a ball bouncing around.

Dearie has gone home to play his games. I'm supposed to be studying my HRM and Accounts. But I've yet to finish my Neil Gaiman SANDMAN comic. I'm halfway through........

Ki's just gone home. The poor little boy cried when he knew we were going to send him back.

Now... it's time to head back to my room... my bed... my comic...
Tonight, 9pm till midnight then I'll do something else.
Catch CSI.
Heeheee!